What's With That New-Fangled "Faceplant" Website All You Kids Are Using Nowadays?

I know I grew up in the computer age, so it should go without saying that I know my way around most electronics. I do know how to work most things like computers and cell phones, however, I most certainly do not know what to do if the computer breaks. This is unfortunate because I tend to break electronics. Not in the literal sense, of course, I’m not a violent person, but in the sense that I push the wrong button or open some program that should have been labeled, “Self-Destruct Function.” Then it won’t work, and I’m sad.

Despite this, when I am on the computer I can at least be secure in the knowledge that I can figure out how things work a lot more easily than most of the people who make up my parents’ generation. I guess the generations before them too. I have recently noticed a lot of conversations with my friends tend to include this topic. In terms of computers:

“My mom just got on Facebook. She keeps asking me if it will steal her credit card numbers. Seriously? I hope you’re not putting your credit card numbers on Facebook, Mom!”

What I’ve found is that the problems older generations face with technology tend to be really stupid. Things go wrong in a hilarious way when our parents and grandparents try to learn dumb tricks and slang that all “us kids” know. On Crazythingsparentssay.com,

Grandma: “WTF, way to go!!”
Me: “What do you think ‘WTF’ means?”
Grandma: “Wow That’s Fantastic…”

And about those dumb tricks? I think all of “us kids” can kind of understand. Remember when AIM came out and we figured out how to make emoticons with normal punctuation? Remember when chat rooms and programs actually made little colored pictures that would show up instead? We thought that was sooo cool, and now we hardly use them. Now that our parents are starting to text us and write on our walls, well you know where this is going…

Courtesy of Mymomisafob.com

*sigh*

And when they finally figure it out…

Courtesy of Nextround.net

Sometimes it’s about learning how to install or work a specific program. I always have to download something for my mom every time I go home, and then show her how to work it. I don’t mind. I just think it’s funny because she’ll forget a lot of it by the next time I come, and I have to show her all over again. Likewise:

“I put Skype on my dad’s computer and showed him how to use it. His first question? ‘Does the other person have to be on Skype at the same time to chat?’ Uh, it’s a video chat program, Dad. Yeah, they do.”

We decided it would be really funny if you left the chat window open accidently and came home to find your computer shouting, “HELLO! ARE YOU THERE??”

Recently, my mom couldn’t figure out how to make the windshield wiper fluid come out of her car, which she’s had for seven years. After watching the rear and front windshield wipers start to wildly flail around, and various liquids start squirting out of various parts of the car, she finally got it right. I suppose I shouldn’t laugh; once I was asked to take my dad’s car to the carwash. My best friend came along, and as soon as we pulled up to the employee we both realized that neither of us had spent enough time in the car to know where the power window buttons were.

Employee: rolling his eyes, *sigh*.
Us: “AHAHHHAHAGHGAHHAAA!!! HANG ON A SECOND!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHGAAHAH!!!” touching and pushing everything we could reach, hoping the magical panel of wonder would open and expose the power window buttons.

They were next to the gear shaft. I don’t know why.

I think the worst part of having to teach things to your parents has to be trying to explain things like they’re four years old, even though you know they aren’t stupid. That and trying to figure out how to tell them what some abbreviation means without getting in trouble:


Uh, it’s just not a very nice thing to say, Mom. Just don’t use it.

I say all this in good humor, since this will be me in 40 years. My great-grandmother never bought a microwave or dishwasher, and I think all of us tend to act like this as we age, though it is pretty cute, and awesome, when older people try to “get with the times.”